How to be a Lifeguard in 12 Easy Steps

It’s not easy to become a Lifeguard (or for me becoming one again.)  Here’s my poetical trip into the world of Lifeguard school.





“Words and Bones” from Finishing Line Press. “You’d never think a skeleton is a complete person. I would have said the same thing about a poem until LB Sedlacek‘s “Words and Bones” came along. It’s a work which truly strips its poems down to their bare bones with all the un-necessary words nowhere to be found, leaving a manuscript of complete and wonderfully brief pieces…”  ~Rick Lupert, author of “God Wrestler”   SEDLACEK-LB-WEB-600x600

The book is $13.99. Include $2.99 per copy for shipping and handling. Please mail all orders with a check payable to Finishing Line Press at PO Box 1626 Georgetown KY 40324 or order online:  Order “Words and Bones” by LB Sedlacek




out to lunch


More poems about adventures in Washington, DC at Eastern Market, a Nationals baseball game, Pete’s Diner, traveling to and fro by train, the Shakespeare Library, the Library of Congress, Union Station and more!





This is a chapbook with travel poems from a recent trip to the North Carolina coast, Ocean Isle, Sunset Beach, Bald Head Island, and to the popular South Carolina beaches, Myrtle, North Myrtle, Cherry Grove. It’s adventure I seek whenever I take a trip. Some of the adventures are mainstream and well some are not! The best part of planning is not to make a plan! That’s how you have the best adventures! It’s great for me to just be by or near the ocean, the water and the sounds of the waves are so soothing. Please join in this new poetical ocean adventure with me!  Reading from “Constellate” on Sunset Beach



infradig“Infra Dig” is my very first all electronic chapbook about pools, chemicals, the Inauguration, Art, moving, pets, birds, you name it, it’s probably in this chapbook. What I mean by it being all electronic – for me – is that I composed it originally on a tablet without ever using paper! The neat thing about poetry is that it can take many forms and it can be composed almost anywhere. It’s an adaptable art! From “Fried Pickles and Fries” – “My friends know I’m a / vegetarian / there say it out loud / and elongate the syllables / vegetarian / they don’t mind / I get quizzed all / the time on when I / became a / say it even slower now / vegetarian / when I didn’t eat vegetables / when I was a child / except / black eyed peas, corn / lima beans / and pickles / (vegetarian)…” From “Moving Trucks and Champagne” – “There’s a van, a truck, an SUV and a moving truck with stuff lots of stuff / you’d expect to find couches, chairs, boxed up food, blankets, pillows, / sheets, toilet paper, pans, pots, jackets, sheets, wall sized paintings, / sculptures. The paintings and sculptures are made by the new owner of the new house, a trailer with a porch added on and a / back room added on out in the country by a river. / The river rocks are round and smooth and large. No lizards in sight. It’s too cold outside. / The water is as cold as ice….” From “It’s a Chemical Life, Part 2” – “I smell like chlorine / I can’t wash it out of my pores / The head lifeguard says the water’s crisp, clear / He straightens the pool deck nearly every day / He says he swims when it’s not busy / My eyes burn from chlorine even with goggles…” From “Playing Electric Guitar” – “I went to see a stranger a man I’d never met he couldn’t leave his apartment / wears orthotic shoes can’t get out much he wanted to do business with me (my / day job business) I drove twenty miles to help him out when I stepped into his / warm small apartment with a living room walk-in kitchen bedroom bathroom my / eyes didn’t seize on decorations or the lack thereof or on family pictures of kids / grandkids or medications spread out on the dining room table and durable / medical equipment to keep him alive my eyes seized upon guitars a blue electric / guitar and a burgundy electric guitar on stands in the living room I told him I take / lessons in a guitar group….”

lb womanPoems and Short stories by poet, author, critic, editor and publisher, LB Sedlacek.






“Hey Astro!” contains all brand new poems about my family’s annual trip from North Carolina to Florida. We do have some adventures! On this past trip we revisited Legoland, Cocoa Beach, Savannah and traipsed through the wilds of South Carolina on the way including a non-stop at South of the Border. Have you ever been to South of the Border? Then, there’s a poem in this book just for you!

Excerpt from “Hey Astro!” – from the poem “Surf Zombies”: “…surfing zombies / with brains intact / with speech intact / but they can’t use either one / no / bro / it’s / against the zombie surfer code…..”

Excerpt from “Hey Astro!” – from the poem “Lake Eloise”: “…butterflies and fishermen / standing in idling boats / talking about the odds / the lack of results / no catch no fish / a lake as vast ….”

Some of the poems in “Hey Astro!”: “It’s Bo Time,” “Welcome to Florida,” “Night Swim,” “The Dinosaur Store, Part 2,” “Putt Putt and Gators,” “Where Orange Juice Comes From,” “Florida Toll Roads,” “Georgia Pecans,” “River Street – Savannah,” “I’ve Never Been to South of the Border” and more!


marsorbustIn her latest collection of poems, LB Sedlacek takes us to Mars and back via Florida, Georgia, and South Carolina. “Will we be able to go to Mars/And back/Return/From Mars…” “The Pirate House/In Savannah/Was where pirates/Met and/Conspired to steal/Everything when…” “Legoland/Lego/Land/(say it with an Irish accent)/Lego land…”



spypic   Ever wondered what it would be like to be a spy? It’s easier than you may think. Find tips and tools in these poems on becoming the best spy ever! Remember always keep your options open!  $.99 (US) Ebook


(The Washington, DC poems)  washdcpic

These poems were written April 2012 and they are one poet’s return to Washington, D.C. They were written on this particular trip back to visit Washington, D.C. where I lived for many years.



deeringThe Cat and the Carroll A. Deering and Other North Carolina Poems” is a book of selected poetry about North Carolina featuring the title poem and the “The Footprints of Nathaniel Batts.”

Other selections include: “Two Arrows And A White Doe,” “The Ballad Of Frankie Silver,” “Laura Foster,” “Blackbeard’s Swamp,” “Walking Into The Sun,” “Third Shift In A Furniture Factory,” “Sleeping In A Hammock,” “Mist Of The Blue Ridge,” “The Legend Of Nags Head,” “Cloud Painting,” and “Mountain Roots.”

From “The Footprints of Nathaniel Batts”:  “The ghost of Nathaniel Batts wanders Albemarle Sound — / appears only on stormy nights / shuffling through the surf, as the seagulls / help him search for his lost love / who’s canoe sank in a storm on the way / to his island – with fields, orchards, / and trees and a lone house / where he lived and died as the first settler who came and stayed in North Carolina….”

From “Blackbeard’s Swamp”:  “Legend tells that Blackbeard / landed here / near New Bern / and that / his ghost still / walks the swamps / of eastern North Carolina / leaving bloody footprints”

From “Walking Into the Sun”:  “Walking; late sunset; North Carolina. / The red bricks mute the sun’s glare. / The asphalt exhales at every street corner. / Cats and dogs play in the streets before / running to their homes in this / Southern town where the Blue Ridge Mountains / rise all around.”


Aqua Jogging by LB SedlacekPoems about pools, swimming, swimmers, lifeguards, and other waterlogged subjects.






I Am My Neighborhood WatchEver find yourself watching everything and everyone where you live? Step into my neighborhood for a bit with these poems.





Twisting by LB SedlacekTwisting, a new poetry chapbook, is now available. Featuring poems of place and imagery.

From “Liquid Bones”:  “Fists slamming into the sky/ turning boundaries into ashes/ liquid bones straight as rails / ripped apart to make more parking lots/ for dormant vehicles/ driven minutes or hours per day / to factories…”

From “Mouthfuls of Fog”:  “Two metal spoons/ Digging/ Through oatmeal./ Like pools of fog/ Over San Francisco Bay / At sunrise…”

From “The Headache Room”:  “Candy apples split/ by a vote of absenteeism/ and faded smiles. The loafers/ crawl up on one another / and battle it out for insoles/ or polish. Red fingers/ flush back bitter morsels/ and the eyes glow …”

Published by Four2Three Press

$3.50 (US) Chapbook (Postage included for US orders only) or $1.50 E-book


A Breath of Paint by LB SedlacekFeaturing travel and adventure poems.   Previously published selections plus new poems too!   Poetry chapbook.   U.S. orders include postage.

Excerpt:  “We ride along the bumpy road staring at the trees / and farms like we’d never seen them before, but / they are as familiar as a baby doe dodging traffic in / search of its mother and it seems that Eddie Money /  is always playing on the radio…”  Published by Four2Three Press   $2 (US) Chapbook (Postage included for US orders only) or $1 (US) Ebook


Tuesday is Wednesday, Vol. 1From my former poetry blog “Tuesday is Wednesday” comes the first volume in a compilation of a variety of works including social commentary and environmental poems. Plus there’s Route 66 haiku — here it is!



Red Headed EskimosMy sixth collection of poetry, “Red Headed Eskimos” explores a variety of subjects often dark and surreal. A vast array of poems covering religious themes, science fiction, social commentary to light adventurous works. Also, works tend to delve beneath the surface, exploring what you know is there but may not want to admit. 28 poems. 53 pages.

From “Prozac Pizza”:  “The deer come right on up to the / front door and spit and chew and drop / their cigarette butts on the ground / just to the right of the sycamore trees.”//

From “Burning Ice”:   “The meeting of velocity and humidity — / won’t be fodder for erasers or / chalkboards or for teachers with / apples. When the ruler touches / the skin, it is simmering.”//

From “The Cement Oasis”:  “Out on the patio in the sun’s glare / A procession of painted bodies / With skins of different hues / Sandwiched together. In hot oils / And tropical scents they lounge. / The sunglass stare / Is practiced with pride — / Near pools without water.”

From “Gravity Fueled Gasoline”:  “Friday at noon the parking lot, / fast deserted especially near the back, / cars pour out into ant lines of traffic, / green, yellow, red the colors of freedom.”

From “Ice Chips”:  “All squirrels should / have minty fresh / breathe or at least take / a trip down the / river at Devil’s Elbow / somewhere in the / middle of Missouri on a / hot July day….”
Chapbook or Ebook


Average Bears“Average Bears” is a chapbook of poetry published by Assume Nothing Press. Poetry selections include title poem plus “Liquid Passport,” “Porcupine Rain,” “The Architect of French Fries,” “Digging Into the Past,” “Paper Thickness,” “Fisherman’s Gift,” “The Opposite of You,” “The Desperate Seriousness of Musicians,” “Life Down Easy,” “Leaf Dance,” “Driving Toward Key West,” and “A Parkway Ballad.” 45 poems. 56 pages.

From “The Architect of French Fries”:  “The French Fry is erasing the ketchup. / It dips back and forth in the fingers. / Putting up absolutely no struggle / As it is sent to its doom….”

From “Liquid Passport”:  “When you shove the needle / into your vein, you can’t /
pull it out immediately. It’s better / to wait and think of the // numbers to count to ten / or ignore conclusion and his / persistent cousin who always seems / to come knocking on Sundays….”

“I enjoyed your image of a french fry erasing ketchup. That’s perfect!” -Jalina Mhyana, Editor — Rock Salt Plum Review


Hemlock Suicides Planned By Well Dressed Men in SuitsPoetry selections include the title poem plus “Grocery Store Headline,” “One Fly’s Journey to the Electric Chair,” “12 Flamingoes & 2 Clowns on Horses,” “Occupying Space,” “Gone Missing,” “The Law of Dance,” and “The Silent House.”

REVIEW of “Hemlock Suicides …” from “MUSE’S REVIEW” – Reviewed by Andrew C. Angus — “This chapbook of LB Sedlacek contains a 27 poem collection that deals with the harsh realities of city life such as divorce, crimes, murder, suicide, corporate environment, etc. Sedlacek is a poet who is not afraid to write poems about the burning social issues of our time …. a social commentary who writes social views in the form of poetry.”


alexandraswreck“Alexandra’s Wreck” is a chapbook of poetry published by Kitty Litter Press. Poetry selections include the title poem plus “The Glass Pumpkin,” “Ghosts Within,” “Monkey Bars,” “Cages,” “Introducing Hope,” “The Illusion of Being,” and “College Basketball and the Crater Lions of Ngorogoro.”

From “Alexandra’s Wreck”: “What are the minnows sewing / as they swim back and forth between / the rotting boards? / These boards have lain on the ocean / bed for days on end / welcoming sand and algae / like long lost friends. / Their rotting innards hold the key — / the secret questioned in a landlubber’s court / when her bones were found under the sea.”

From “Monkey Bars”:  “A tattered pair of overalls / — red with a patch of blue in the middle / swinging forward then back / then high into the air / as the little hands grip the steel bars / one hand moving forward, / and the other quickly following.”
From “Ghosts Within”: “We are driving, Big Dipper / to the right of this country highway / lit only by the moon flung high overhead – / partying with the stars.”
Published by Kitty Litter Press.